Tell me Tuesday: The life of an Agony Aunt

For my entire adult life (and probably even a bit before that), I’ve been a source of advice for my friends and for a period of time I ran an Agony Aunt column, though that was short lived. Anyway, I’ve been asked quite a few questions lately, and I’ve decided I’ll post some of the things I help people with. Even if I can manage to help one extra person with these answers, it’ll be worth it. Enjoy!

Q:  Boy won’t leave me alone, broken up with him a third time, what do?

A: Try ignoring him for a few days – the more he’ll try to message you, the less he’ll feel like it’s a stable even relationship (even though it obviously isn’t if you’re trying to break up with him!), so then when you do respond with an ‘eh’ kinda attitude, then he might finally get that you’re not into him anymore?

Q: There’s this guy – one minute he’s blowing hot, the next moment cold -shrugs-. What can do.

A: I’d do the same with him – ignore him for a little bit, go quiet on your end – and then see how he reacts. If he’s really into you he’ll get worried that you haven’t replied in a while. If he’s not then he won’t make such a big effort to get in contact with you.. if that makes sense. Like in the same way that I get worried when I haven’t heard from my best friend in a few days, but don’t give a rats-ass when I haven’t heard from someone I don’t care about in months, even though on the surface I may pretend to be friendly with them.

…Silence brings out imagination and a terrible paranoia in people – but only when they care about you. If he really cares he will make the effort to talk to you because you’ll be on his mind.

Q: I prefer polygamy but I am not sure how to bring this up when it comes to having relationships with people?

A: Honesty is the best policy. With something like polygamy you want to make sure that your prospective partner knows sooner rather than later, nothing’s more awkward than getting 1 or 2 months down the track and they want things to get serious – and exclusive. If you can’t bring yourself to tell them, then you’re just going to have to build up the courage, especially if it’s the lifestyle you want. It may be a deal-breaker for some people, but when you find that honest relationship with someone who understands it’ll be completely worth it.

…if you have a question you’d like me to answer, post a question below!

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